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Give Me One Reason
Tracy Chapman & Eric Clapton

Saint 2.0

Friday, November 14, 2008
Tough Choice | 12:25 PM

Don't Give Up
Josh Groban

I bought a couple of CDs and a DVD featuring Gorban at our final stop in Manila.  

This song was playing in the background while I was doing some work.  It occured to me that in the last 10 days or so, many have again told me that I should go back into teaching fulltime because I make a great teacher (I'm not boasting about this here because I didn't say this okay).  

Actually I've discussed this at length with my 2 colleagues who had been with me on the trip.  Honestly, I miss teaching a great deal.  I've even told the kids on the trip that one of the reasons I went along was that I felt bad leaving my form class halfway through the year when I quit and that half of them were on the trip.  And I had such an amazing time on the trip which resembles the joys I have had when I was a fulltime teacher.  

So what's stopping me?  If I am not an English/Literature teacher with its accompanying insane, incessant and heaviest marking load, I would go back in a flash.  Add to that a host of other administrative duties - some of which are yours by default because you are THE language person, they just take away time to really interact with your charges and influence them to the dark side (just kidding!).   More teachers (and some very good ones, mind you!) I know are quitting at the end of this year, even during the looming economic crisis and that itself speaks volumes about the overwhelming load of Singapore teachers nowadays.  Before I go into another round of lampooning the state of the profession here in Singapore, I am reminded to focus on the positive by the Manila trip.  

Am I prepared to pay the cost by going back full-time?  I don't have an answer at this point because of a myraid other push factors.  My heart is willing but does that make my flesh weak because I attribute it to the ridiculous workload?   There are other factors which I cannot mention here because this is not a restricted blog.  

Anyhow, I do love teaching English and Literature.  I still think teaching is the most noble profession in the world.  It's just that the state of teaching in Singapore has evolved to become a farce or a stageplay.   You either stay true to the calling and perhaps perish or just drift along and find ways to cut corners (and they call it working smart sometimes!).  

Okay.  Be positive.  Don't focus on the circumstances.  

I am thankful that I have 2 jobs that will provide me adequately during these tough times.  It's the intrinsic satisfaction that I miss and yearn for badly after recent experiences and "callings" I hear from many around me.  

So the blue pill or the red pill - it's a tough choice I will have to make some day.

In the meantime, enjoy the MTV below. 



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